‘I’m starting to feel human again’: Army Veteran advocates for VA services after difficult battle with PTSD

In the living room, it was clear his two dogs had clashed. His lab-ridgeback mix was hunched over a food bowl, growling. His new black Labrador puppy lay on the hardwood floor. Blood was everywhere.

Kyle crouched down and lifted the puppy’s small, quivering body into his arms. Streaks of blood smeared across his hands.

Then the room vanished.

His living room turned into desert heat and blinding light. He could hear distant shouting, a radio squawking and the echo of gunfire. He wasn’t home anymore; he was back on mission under a sun that beat against his helmet, breathing air thick with dust.

“I was in theater,” Kyle says. “I just stood there, bawling my eyes out. I was reliving something I didn’t want to relive.” 

Two deployments, then dealing with PTSD

The 38-year-old was deployed twice in his 10-year military career, once to Iraq as a light infantryman, and then to Afghanistan as a sniper.

When he returned to the civilian world, he fought against intrusive memories and numbed himself with alcohol.

“There was just a lot of anger,” Kyle says.

His wife, Lorri, who he met after his service, eventually became somewhat of his caretaker.

“It got to the point where I couldn’t go anywhere without her,” Kyle says.

Kyle didn’t want to be a burden on Lorri, and he often thought she would be better off without him.

“I’m not saying he would ever act on it, but there were a lot of suicidal thoughts,” Lorri says. “I just had to keep talking him off that ledge, letting him know he is loved, he is supported, he does have people here who will not let him go.”

Recognizing he needed additional support, Lorri took the reins. She helped him get a service dog and encouraged him to seek more serious medical attention to address his issues. When he couldn’t find the right treatments, she pushed him to keep trying other options.

That led the couple to Northern Arizona VA Healthcare System. Kyle was skeptical at first, but he knew he had to do something different.

“Either I find the courage to seek help from the VA, or I lose my wife and family,” says Kyle.

Facing his fears, getting answers

Though Kyle was convinced no one would truly understand his demons, he forced himself to try group therapy and quickly realized it was a needed piece to his puzzle. 

“To my surprise, I saw common ground with others,” Kyle says. “I felt a sense of happiness, hopefulness and finally, I was on a mission for peace.”

Through continued sessions, he began developing trust in Dr. Jennifer Sigler, post-traumatic stress disorder program manager.

Sigler suggested Kyle try a form of cognitive behavioral therapy called prolonged exposure, which helps people slowly confront memories, emotions and circumstances connected to their trauma.

“Prolonged exposure really works for a lot of Veterans,” says Sigler. “It’s difficult, but as long as they know that going into it, then they can usually get through it.”

What’s important to recognize with PTSD, Sigler says, is there’s no one-size-fits-all treatment plan. 

“What we really try to do is collaborate with the Veteran,” she says. “Meet them where they’re at to see what type of treatment will be most helpful for them.”

For Kyle, a whole-health approach has worked best, including how his physical trauma is connected to his mental. For example, his Patient Aligned Care Team identified his eyes as the cause of the headaches and disorientation he frequently experienced.

“The trauma I had from a blast caused my eyes to revert back to being a 6-year-old’s eyes,” he says.

Kyle now goes to group therapy, prolonged exposure, physical therapy and eye trauma therapy every week.

“It’s been amazing,” he says. “I feel so much better than I did a year ago.” 

Finding new purpose

As Kyle’s physical and mental health noticeably improved, so has his personal life. 

He’s now able to be in public for extended periods of time and not rely on his wife to always be there to comfort him.   

“I’m starting to feel human again,” he said. 

What was once an aimless hobby of playing video games has turned into a full-time occupation with meaning behind it. Using multiple online streaming channels, he now hosts video game events for his Veteran peers. 

“It gave me a purpose again,” Kyle said. “I have a community full of Veterans that I’ll do charities, fundraisers or gatherings with. Especially for younger Veterans, gaming gets us out of our heads and makes it easier to open up and be there for each other.”

And instead of bottling his emotions up like he used to, Kyle now shares everything about his PTSD journey with his family, friends and anyone who needs to hear it. 

“With hard work, determination, a few hiccups and giving yourself a little grace, you can be successful,” Kyle said to a crowd of peers and community members during a PTSD awareness event in 2025. “For me, that fracture I mentioned earlier, it began to heal. Yours can too!”